medicalpunch | [Luceti] Appointments

[She gasps as she feels his hand on her backside, a hard grope so unlike the way anyone else has touched her before now. But it isn't unwanted -- no, far from it. It sends a new surge of heat through her, and her hands claw up his chest to find the zip of his flack vest, dragging it down to get that thick layer out of the way.

Inspired by the passion he's turning on her, she catches his lower lip between her teeth, giving a firm nip. She's not just going to passively take what he's dishing out, she's going to dish right back!]

[ Kakashi hums into the kiss, tongue teasing across the curve of Sakura's mouth. He can't seem to get enough of her, of this, and it feels so good to kiss her, even if in the back of his mind he knows he probably should stop. He wants to look at her though, really look at her so he can ask her where she'd like to take this next, and breaks the kiss softly as he starts to pull back.

Maybe he'll even uncover her eyes... ]

[ It's at that very moment that something hits him hard and he realizes what the fuck is happening with a sharp inhale through his nose that has him yanking up his mask and taking a step back, fingers slipping from Sakura's eyes in the process.

What the hell just happened? What possessed him to kiss her, to cross the line between teacher and student and take advantage of her in such a way? He knows his actions are grossly inappropriate, completely unacceptable, and Kakashi doesn't know what he should do, how he should fix this.

Isn't even sure what he should say to her. ]

S-Sakura--

[ He begins, taking another halting step back, staring at her in dismay. He needs to say something. He needs to find the right words. He needs to set this right, even though he has no idea where to begin. He needs to--

He needs to go.

Kakashi brings his fingers up into a seal, and with a bust of smoke, he's gone, shunshin'd out of her apartment, not even leaving a trace of chakra behind. ]

[Clarity snaps back into her in a flood, and she stares at Kakashi wide-eyed, the crimson flush in her cheeks. What were they just doing? What possessed them -- what possessed him?

He vanishes while she's leaning back against the wall reeling, and for a long moment, she stares at the empty spot where he was, panting, too shocked to immediately react.

And then the fury crashes in on her, and she shrieks aloud, slamming a fist into the wall hard enough to leave a crater.]

You fucking monsters!

[Not that the Malnosso will care. But she can picture them snickering to each other at the performance they made her and Kakashi put on, can picture them getting their jollies off of making innocent young women make out with their much older teachers, and the prospect makes her see red.

That she caught a quick, fleeting glimpse of a part of Kakashi's face won't occur to her till later, after her rage cools.]

[ It's a curt message. All business. ]

Sakura, I need you to meet me at Flame Building. Eighth floor, apartment 36. I have Iruka-sensei here with me, and he's injured. He could use your help.

Edited 2014-01-20 07:33 (UTC)

[ It's taken him a long time to work up the ability to do this. Reaching out to his students after what he did to them has been difficult. Almost impossible. He kept telling himself it'd be far easier to just pretend as though it never happened; surely, they all must have fallen victim to the mistletoe more than once, and it would be easy to wave it off as some strange, unfortunate event that they should just quickly forget about.

But he knows that at the end of the day, he still owes them all an apology. Still needs to make this right, even if it's taken him a while to actually get around to doing it.

The voice message starts out with a very long pause as Kakashi tries to think of what to say.

Ends up just saying: ]

Sakura. We need to talk.

[She doesn't respond immediately when she gets the message; for a long time, she just stares at the journal entry, a frown planted on her face, trying to decide how she wants to handle this.

She's still angry about the whole thing, and as much as she knows that Kakashi's not at all to blame for what happened -- he was just as much a victim as she was -- she still has to fight the urge to answer with anger.

But she doesn't do it; she waits until the anger cools down, and then responds, her voice flat and obviously uncomfortable.]

Do we have to?

[See, this? This is easy to deal with. This is all business.]

I'm on my way.

[ Kakashi can sense the discomfort in Sakura's voice, the guarded way she speaks. Can tell, by how long it took her to respond, just how uneasy this makes her. It's possible she might not ever want anything to do with him again. Never call him sensei again. Refuse to talk to him at all.

And if she wants to do all of that, clearly it's her choice, and it's not something Kakashi can argue with, when he broke her trust in such a way.

Even if it wasn't something he could control. ]

Please, Sakura.

[ His voice comes out far too quiet. Strained.

At the very least, he needs to apologize to her. ]

[Again, her response comes slowly; this approach isn't what she expects from him. Why is he deciding to be serious and strained now, when she'd really prefer to handle this with avoidance and a deliberate reach toward normalcy?]

I don't see what there is to talk about.

[The words are abrupt; she's not good at hiding her discomfort with this. The things that the Malnosso have made her do -- too many of them strike all too close to her weak points.]

Neither of us was acting willingly. It's like a genjutsu you can't break.

[Bitten-off sentences, but it's something of a forgiveness; she knows Kakashi wouldn't do that of his own volition. Not to her.]

[ Maybe this was a bad idea. Maybe Kakashi shouldn't have bothered reaching out all. Maybe he could've just gone on pretending like nothing ever happened. Acted like it wasn't an issue at all. But what he did was wrong, even if it wasn't something he did willingly.

The fact is: it still happened. ]

I still hurt you.

[ Kakashi says softly. ]

I broke your trust. For that...

[ Really, he should be doing this in person, but he doesn't know if she would even trust being in a room with him right now. ]

... I'm sorry.

Don't.

[The word is thin, but emphatic. She's glad they're not doing this in person; she feels a lot more in control when she's dealing with a journal in her hands, instead of Kakashi's presence in the room with her. She's had too many bad experiencing with lingering aftereffects of various experiments.

That's the last thing they need.]

Don't you dare tell me that you did any of that. The Malnosso control us; they drive us out of their minds.

Unless you're going to sit there and tell me that that was something you actually wanted to do, on your own, without their influence... don't you dare act like you've got to make some kind of penance.

[Because if he does, then that applies to her, too -- all the things that she's done under their influence, all the things that other people have done to her. And that, too. That, the thing he's talking about. The most recent, and in some ways most egregious, of the violations against her.]

Edited 2014-01-20 21:49 (UTC)

[ Kakashi falls silent then, because what does he say to that?

Even if it wasn't something he actually wanted to do, it doesn't change the fact that it still happened. That he even enjoyed it at the time made it that much worse, made the line between what the Malnosso wanted him to do, and what he wanted to do that much more blurry. (But then, he enjoyed all the other kisses too.)

The fact that Sakura is a female student though, seems to exacerbate the situation even more. He doesn't know how much experience she's had, and if that was the first time she'd experienced anything like that...

He can only hope it wasn't. ]

[It's not the first time -- and it's not the worst the Malnosso have done to her. But the fact that it's Kakashi, someone far older than her, an authority figure over her -- even if he's not quite old enough to be her father, it feels like it sometimes, and she's put him in the same category.

It all still feels awful, though.

The lack of response from him troubles her, though. After a little bit, when he doesn't seem to have any interest in responding to her, she reaches out again.]

I've been here longer than you have, Sensei. Believe me -- if you take everything personally, it's going to be really hard. Some things... when they do this to you, you can't act like it's your own doing. You'll go crazy.

[ It's too late for that, he almost says, but doesn't.

Despite her reassurances, Kakashi still can't help but feel guilty, terrible at the lines he had crossed. Can't help but be terrified that it might happen again, without his knowing. What then? What if it hadn't stopped at just a kiss? ]

As your sensei, it's my duty to protect you. But instead...

[ He sighs.

Switches gears. This isn't about him, and he shouldn't make it about him. This is about Sakura, and how she feels.

He takes a breath. Lets it out.]

If you would rather distance yourself from me, I would understand.

[Been there, done that. She doesn't need to speculate.

Instead, she sighs, frustrated at his response.]

Maybe when I was a genin. But right now, I'm not under your command, and this isn't a mission. I'm not a child anymore. You don't have to protect me.

[Back home, back on the battlefield, he can't. So there's that.]

If you distance yourself from me, then they've won. [Ignore how she's been avoiding Neji and Shikamaru both. That's different.] The best victory is to just carry on like everything's normal, and they can go to hell.

[ Kakashi wants to tell Sakura that she's wrong, that she'll always be his student, and it will always be his duty to protect her. No matter how old she might be. Or whether they are on a mission. But the other part of her message is more pressing.

She'd like for him to carry on as though nothing had happened at all. Act like it never happened. ]

Alright.

[ Concedes quietly. ]

I can do that.

[This diamond on her forehead says she's not a little girl who needs protecting, Kakashi. He hasn't had the chance to see it in action yet, but once he does, she can hope he'll understand.]

Good.

[It's hard to leave off on that note, though. The tension is still there, even with the distance the journals give.]

It's not something you did to me. It's something they did to us. End of story.

[ Even if he does see it in action, that will never change the way he feels.

End of story.

Kakashi hums a noncommittal sound. Thinks of what else to say, and comes up short. Presses send anyway. ]

[He doesn't believe her. She's pretty positive that's what that little hum means. And suddenly, she feels like she just can't deal with it anymore.]

Come see me.

[There's an imperious note in her voice, something of Tsunade in the way she says it, sharp and firm. It's an order, not a request.]

I want to talk to you in person.

Sakura-chan, you've gotta help me study for the Jounin exams! Err- I mean, we should study together! Yeah- that's it!

Do you know anything about... let's see.. [He's reading something written down by the looks of it.]

....The ninja rules verbatim, important theories...theorems of combat strategy, the five hundred fifty five laws of defense.....

Sixty-seven formulas of battle.....

Battle strategies for the essays... I think I can do that one on my own... what does he mean by analyze famous fights??

Help!!

[Your team mate sure did get trolled by Kakashi.]

[She listens to this message and laughs. It's pretty obvious that Kakashi's trolling, but given what their written exam for chuunin was like, it sounds just plausible enough for her to run with, despite her inexperience on the "trolling one's teammates" front.]

[When she opens the video to respond, though, she makes sure her expression is quite serious.]

I don't know, Naruto... are you sure you're supposed to ask me that? A jounin is supposed to know all of this information already, from experience and lots of learning. Don't you think getting the answers from me would be like cheating?

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!

[ARGH WHY DOES HIS WHOLE TEAM SUCK]

[Excuse him a moment as he just flops down ALL DRAMATIC LIKE you can barely see him on the journal anymore.]

So you're not gonna help me?!

[Come on, girl, keep a straight face, keep a straight face.... don't laugh at him, the troll is too perfect to break.]

Well, maybe I can give you some hints. Just between us, you know.

[Luceti] Appointments

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voice - january 20 - after dealing with mistletoe consequences

voice - january 15 - 100% filtered

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Video, Feb 9th

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